Reminiscing Luddy, Lying Lutz
by someoneyou'llhate
Summary: Sorry gotta go! summary:Ludwig is wondering whether remembering is always this weird, Lutz proved him so. T cuz I just like it


**Sorry! This was supposed to be a oneshot, but it turned out longer than I expected.**

**But don't worry, still PWP actually. Had to cut it until here, not enough time, had to rush!**

**I'm not the one to ask for reviews but if you like it, tell kay.**

**Can't risk delaying on 'YAOI life of Ludwig' can I?**

**Let see... warning: still fugly writing, confusing, shonen-ai but nothing explicit**

**If it's okay for me to just stop here I'll do it!**

**Summary: HRE/Germany need more love people! I had favourite quotes but can never find the right time to use 'em. And Lutz is here to help me. Yeah, just mainly quotes, those italics writing.**

**Sorry if it gave ya'll brain seizures! XC  
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**XOXO**

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><p>He couldn't recall what he forgot, but he always memorized what he couldn't remember.<p>

It was since long ago had his memories slip his mind. So long, that he overlooked the first time he was unable to reminisce his past. But he evoked the time he forgot so much, that he recalled when it caused him so much trouble that he wished he didn't remember.

He never paid much attention to his recollection that was slowly turning into Switzerland's famous cheese until when he was sitting comfortably on his bed, comforter over his body, glasses equipped to fight off the dim light and a book of his favourite author (nom de plume: HRR) in hand.

_Memory is a way of holding on to the things you love, the things you are, and the things you never want to lose._

That was the first quote he remembered since he stopped forgetting.

xxxx

Everybody knew that Ludwig is a brave man. Having growing up amidst a battle field, suffering physically, mentally and emotionally... it was what they all had gone through their whole lives.

Centuries of hardship that they can neither escape nor pursue. It was natural for them compete on who could keep the natural face the longest.

But this, though?

Entering into his room and finding his exact doppelganger, sitting casually on his bed, blinking, breathing and talking (_'hallo there,'_ he said)

It was more than he could take.

He screamed.

xxxx

His memories came back to him like a reversed clock. Starting from the present, so he doubted it will be anytime soon until he could remember the carbon copy that acknowledges himself as an old acquaintance.

An old 'special' acquaintance.

The awkwardness was unavoidable, but it just gave him more reason to question.

"Is there a reason why you are here?"

"You will know sooner or later,"

"And why not sooner?"

"Because it will be later,"

"Why should I not just ignore you?"

"Something will come,"

"Pardon?"

"Something will happen to one of us,"

"How... would you know?"

"I don't"

"Stop messing with me,"

"I'm not,"

"Than just give me a straight answer already!"

"I would if I could,"

"You're not making any sense,"

"That's the more reason I need to be with you,"

"What-"

"I'm just as lost as you are, Luddy,"

"... Who... are you?"

"You'll know..."

"What's your name?"

"I'll be Lutz, you'll be Luddy,"

"...No,"

"Trust me, remembering it yourself is better,"

"...How do you know I'll remember you?"

Then, the man laughs. Big and loud and (as Ludwig starts to remember) unnatural, flashing a smile with the same blue eyes, "Because Luddy," curving the same pink lips

"_The heart that truly loves never forgets."_

xxxx_  
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Lutz promised to visit (entering through the window of the bedroom at night of course), Ludwig would be reading his book (which is also Lutz work since he is HRR) and they both would talk until the bedside clock beep 11:00.

It was only the second day they met, and yet Lutz already found it comfortable enough to start smoking in Ludwig's room despite the other's protest.

"Where were you living anyway?"

"Were?"

"Well... you are... like one of _us_, right,"

"... Can I sit on your bed?"

"Huh?"

"I mean, that's unfair! The chair's not that comfy you know,"

"Why should I?"

"You won't believe how much wonders I could do,"

"Name,"

"How long do you think I've been stalking you?"

"You've been _stalking_ me?"

"Give,"

Ludwig growled and threw a pillow at his other self before scooting over to the side to make room. Ludwig's hair was ruffled in subtle revenge.

"Ah, that book, I liked the part when Eddy-"

"No, no, no! No spoiling!"

Lutz chuckled, "but you're the one that was too eager to know the truth in the first place,"

Another pillow was thrown, "If I have a time machine-"

"That'll be a long time,"

"I wished I never met you,"

"Yeah?" a puff of smoke was blown out, Ludwig cringed. "I wished I never wrote that book,"

"... Should I ask why?"

"Yes,"

"... Why?"

"Because I hate the name Eddy,"

"... We're discussing about a mechanism that can change the earth... and all you can think of is _that_?"

There were silence for a while before Lutz stood up, walked away and the cigarette was flicked out off the window, he swung his left leg out and gave Ludwig his second smile while casually sitting at the window frame.

"_We all have our time machines."_

Ludwig blinked.

"_Some take us back, they're called memories,"_

The clock beeped 11.

"_Some take us forward, they're called dreams."_

And Lutz was gone.

xxxx

The third time they met was in Ludwig's office, Lutz having him mortified at strolling leisurely around the building like nothing's wrong (to others not, but the risk and consequences were severe)

Disguise was only a tad change in fashion, but it still had Ludwig nagging at his counterpart (_'I would not wear that kind tie and your collar is way too low'_ he said)

"You really have a boring life don't you?"

"Well, at least _someone_ has responsibilities in their life," here, Ludwig flashed Lutz a meaningful glare while busily signing the documents.

"Yeah. All those fan mails are really annoying; you should be entertaining me,"

Ludwig sighed; it's no use is it? "Why should I?"

"Because I'll promise you Jane will suffer a horrible fate if you don't,"

"... She's a wonderful young lady-"

"Sacrifices Luddy..."

"Don't you have to look for inspirations or something? Cure your writer's block?"

"Surprisingly I am,"

"... But you just said I have a boring life,"

"Yes, so tedious, I'm sure it'll make millions cry,"

"Your mockery is a disappointment,"

"I'm not making fun of anybody, Luddy. I'm already tearing up right now,"

"Don't you have friends or something?"

"I had,"

"... Why not have,"

"It's something about humans and immortality that doesn't mix. I'm tired of moving away every decade, so it's better I know no one,"

"... You really _are_ one of us... aren't you?"

"Is it too hard to believe?"

"Then, why are you still here?"

"Is it a crime?"

"No... I mean... you- _we_ suppose to have... you know... territory,"

"Then why don't you go ask _Prussia_,"

It wasn't a question, it was just pure venom. Something tugs sharply at Ludwig's heart and he was sure that he deserved it; a glance away from his papers told him that Lutz wasn't even looking at him.

"... I'm sorry,"

"If you ever remember, I wonder if you still will,"

"... Of course I would..." he was questioning that statement but decided that this wasn't the right time.

"How is dear Italy? He's my first crush you know!"

Ludwig stammered, "He-he's fine,"

"Ah~ _he_... can never get out of my mind perfectly,"

"Excuse me?"

"The last time I saw him, he was wearing a dress, can't properly see him as a man though,"

"Then how do you-"

"Oops, second last! Been stalking him too before moving from to France, he kind of gave me a heart attack that time,"

"... You..."

"That'll be the last time I'll peek into someone's shower,"

"... You're unbelievable,"

"Austria's funny too, France, Hungary, Spain- Can't remember their alias though,"

"It must've been a long time,"

"Quite,"

"You want to see them, for old time sake?"

"Of course I would, I just can't,"

"... Why not,"

"Don't be a child Luddy. Besides, they all have a small part of them in me, now all I want is from you,"

"... You want to... peek into my shower?"

"Well, actually I just want to crack a smile to that thing you call face, but if you insist,"

"No,"

"Please?"

"No,"

"Ah, no worries, you'll let me sooner or later,"

"No! Why do you want to-"

"Oh Luddy, you naive lamb, I meant the smile,"

"... Is it really that important?"

"_A smile happens in a flash, but its memory can last a lifetime,"_ Lutz smiled.

For once, Ludwig believed him.

xxxx

His memory was filling him and he could feel it. The tiny insignificant details kicked him at the sides whenever possible, the coins he had lost (he left it at the counter), the meal that disappeared (he fed them to his dogs) and the first horror book from HRR that he read (_30 years_).

So now, when someone opted to forget the details, he can't stop remembering that it was the tenth time Lutz visited.

"So... you proposed to him..."

Ludwig blushed brightly, "I-I was confused! I'm not really good at those things"

"You still love him?"

"N-no... I found out we're just best as friends,"

"You sure?"

"Yes, yes! Can you stop it! It's not the best of memories I had,"

"Not a single feeling?"

"YES! He's all yours, now shut up!" a pillow was thrown directly at the face.

"No, I mean... to anybody else,"

"Sooner or later, maybe,"

"You really are boring aren't you?"

"Maybe you should think twice before choosing me as your inspiration subject,"

Lutz blinked a bit before hastily typing something in his laptop, cigarette between his lips, Ludwig had to resist the urge to peek. He is bizarre, but utterly interesting; the loud mouth finally stopped talking whenever an idea struck him like a lightning bolt.

"So..." Lutz began, fingers still dancing on the keyboard, "Do you lie a lot?"

"I think I'm the one in place to ask that,"

"Do I really look suspicious?"

"Your _looks _had past astonished me- and don't worry, you look wonderful,"

"Says the dog to his own reflection,"

"I never think you're a reflection,"

"A mirror then?"

"That makes no difference, and besides, a mirror talks no more than the master,"

"And the master is blessed with such an amazing image,"

"Thank you,"

"You're just as haughty as Gilbert,"

"He'll do anything to be in my place right now,"

"Talking to yourself and boasting about your own looks. Yup, you're one step closer in becoming a Prussian,"

"I don't think it's anywhere near possible to reach that much of an ego,"

"Ah, but believe it or not, you witnessed it yourself,"

"Still unbelievable,"

"I thought you said you've seen the impossible,"

"Seeing doesn't mean believing,"

"Does that mean you still won't trust me?"

"I sense that there is more bite in your bark,"

"... Perhaps, Luddy. _Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask and he will tell you the truth."_

"And what if it is a mirror mask?"

And Lutz laughed the same laugh from the first time, still as big, still as loud, and still unnatural.

But then, he talked no more.

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><p><strong>XOXO<strong>

**That's it! Later people!**


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